This question, this simple little question, has had an incredible impact on my self-worth awareness. Yes. It is simple. Yet incredibly powerful. "What is my motivation?"
My ego does not enjoy when I ask myself this question.
What is my motivation when I am in a heated discussion with another person?
What is my motivation when I am judging somebody?
What is my motivation when I share information, comments, status updates, and pics on Facebook?
What is my motivation behind clinging to certain "titles, roles, jobs, etc?"
What is my motivation behind sharing what I do in blog posts?
What is my motivation when I stay busy all the time and won't allow myself to rest?
I could go on but I will stop with just these questions. When I ask these questions I have a quick awareness of just where my sense of worth is tied up. If I am judging somebody then I am not feeling good enough about myself in some area. If I start to panic at the thought of not being at a certain job or carrying a "title" or "playing" a life role then I can tell what my self-worth is based on. If I find myself staying busy all the time and not resting then I am telling myself my needs are not worth anything. I am not worthy of self-care. My do-ing is what makes me worthy.
I ask myself sometimes why do I share on Facebook? Am I basing my worth on how people respond to me, see me, or the "illusion"of me I create. Is there a part of me that needs to be heard and seen to feel worth anything? Or is it because I just enjoy posting updates and sharing information with others?
Let me say that I do not create an illusion. I am quite honest and forward about what I share. The "illusion" is that every pic I post is me happy and having a good time. That is only a part of my life. There is another part that isn't always like that.
I enjoy sharing through social media including blog posts. I have accepted this and as long as I keep asking myself, "What is my motivation?" I keep myself in check:) I have started asking myself this question and since I have it has stopped me from many judgemental remarks and posts, arguments, lack of self-care moments, and painful awareness of how quickly I can get my worth tied up in a role or do-ing.
If you can relate to any of the questions above then I invite you to ask yourself one or two of them. What are your initial reactions? What physical sensations happen in your body? What are your first thoughts? Just notice. Cultivate Awareness.
"We are taught in this society to look outside to define ourselves and give us a feeling of worth, We have worth if we are better than others. We are validated in comparison to others, for being smarter, richer than, prettier, more talented, etc. This empowers the illusion of separation and feeds the fear of not being good enough."
"True Self-Worth does not come from comparing to or judging others but going within and awakening to the connection of others. When we look within and define our own truths we can celebrate the differences of each other instead of judging from fear."
"True self-worth comes from accessing your internal truth within-that state of grace which is your true being. Only you can define your truth NOT the media, your employers, friends, family, only you!"
"Anyone who feels they have to be productive to feel good about themselves will feel like a victim
when not productive."
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